Yeah, I’ve had it. There is a time for graciousness and a time to be strident. Welcome to strident central. Too many adults are acting like a bunch of spoiled children. I have a simple message to these crybabies. Grow up! All of you!
Hillary Clinton…grow up. Knock it off. Stop trying to have it both ways on every single issue. Take some clear stands. Tick people off for the right reasons. Tick people off because they disagree with what you stand for. Stop ticking people off for refusing to stand for anything. Enough obfuscating, triangulating, and calculating. Stop treating every person that disagrees with you as either an imbecile or evil. Stop talking about how tough you are and then hiding behind your husband when the boys hit back. You are not the girl who got beat up in school. You are an adult. Fight your own battles.
Bill Clinton…enough! Quit blaming the media for the fact that your wife is stiff as a board. You had a quarter of a century to teach her how to be likable. She failed. It is either your fault…or more likely, hers. The media had their heads so far up your hide in the 1990s that it was tough to tell where you began and they ended. Now they like Barack Obama. Are they biased? Sure. You were fine with this when they were fawning over you. You kept claiming it was about the people. Prove it. Be quiet, let the campaign unfold without you, and let the people decide. You have bullied enough people. Now you are trying to bully liberal reporters and even liberal voters. I would tell you it won’t work, but knowing you, it will. It does not make it right. I know you grew up in the 1960s, but enough already.
Disenchanted conservatives…stop it! Rudy Giuliani, John McCain, Mitt Romney and (recently departed from the race) Fred Thompson are all fabulous. They are not perfect. Giuliani is not a social conservative. McCain is not your illegal immigration guy. McCain and Thompson supported that awful campaign finance law. Romney is liberal on social issues, or at least was for a long time. So what? Ronald Reagan raised taxes. We are electing a President, not a saint.
Some conservatives want to form a 3rd party to teach the republican party a lesson. You will be marginalizing yourselves, not the party. No sane conservative is happy about the spending under GOP rule in this century. Then again, no sane conservative wants Hillary in the White House. For those who think a moderate republican is no better than Hillary, just remember how Bill Clinton made you feel. Multiply that 100 fold…that is Hillary. Stop craving perfection. You sound like 40 year old women crying because they rejected every man at age 25, and are now childless at 40. There is no perfection. There is good enough. Support your candidate in the primary, and when the nominee is decided…Fall into line!
Investors…stop crying. The stock market is gambling. It will not go up every day. There will be losses. Do not blame your brokers, your God, or the person who gave you the stock tip. Stop trying to get rich overnight. Oh, and you might want to actually read your statements, and the company reports. Buy real companies with real earnings. If you are too busy to do the research, then shut up, by a boring mutual fund, and check back in 20 years. If you want to buy individual stocks, either go along for the ride. If riding roller coasters makes you airsick, by bank CDs. Just quit crying.
For those of you who bought subprime mortgages, it’s the irresponsibility stupid. You would have screwed up your life in some other way given the chance. You wanted something for nothing. You blame greedy lenders, but nobody forced you to buy, and nobody denied you the right to read what you signed. I would love to buy, but prices are high. I rent. I have seen guys drive $100,000 cars, and then have those cars repossessed. They laugh at my car, but I own my car. The bank does not own it. It is 100% mine.
Populists…shut up. Profits are good. Higher corporate profits are better. Corporations make stuff or provide services. If they lose money, they stop providing stuff. If you confiscate their profits through punitive tax measures because you are jealous of their success, they will stop researching cures for diseases, insuring homeowners, heating your homes, or providing the food and drink on your kitchen table. Businesses are not hear to work for free. Do you individuals work for free? Do you want 1/2 your money taken away? Well neither do corporations, which last time I checked, were run by people.
Hollywood…Stay on strike. I only watch news and sports. This is not a labor-management dispute that anywhere near rivals the issues that real businesses that matter deal with. This is not the right to earn overtime, have safe working conditions, or feed a family. These are millionaires fighting with billionaires. It is liberals who write about republican greed fighting with liberals who produce shows about republican greed. They are at each other’s throats because they are all greedy. Let them cannibalize each other. Or better yet, act like adults, and reach an agreement, or the 12 people who still care might stop caring. These parasites are replaceable.
I wake up in the morning, and realize that nobody will benefit my existence but me. My boss, my friends, and my family can listen to me up to a certain point, but they cannot give me what I need. I lead a happy life because if I don’t, nobody will care, so I might as well be happy. Plus, there are worse things than being young, caucasian, and successful in America today. I wouldn’t mind being taller and wealthier, but life is not perfect. Would I like to take Shannon Doherty until we shatter the headboards? Sure. Will anybody care besides me if I don’t? No.
So what do I do? I look down, and notice that I have a pair of testicles. I recommend that if any man does not have them, grow a pair immediately. For those who are female, grow something that makes you act in the same tough and dignified way men act when they have aforementioned appendages. Everybody, just grow a pair already.
Then get ready to celebrate my favorite holiday. I call it “Shut the hell up and go to work day.” It should be celebrated 40 hours a week, 50 weeks per year, and perhaps even when on vacation.
For those who I forgot to verbally rap upside the head, snap out of it before I do get to you. For those of you that actually do possess (not so) common sense, thank God for you. You may be diminishing in number, but you are appreciated in terms of quality.